tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post5730313161908954167..comments2023-08-14T16:10:38.074+02:00Comments on Adornments for Dreams: Romantic Friday Writers Challenge for March - Driven to MurderAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17926688000745346961noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-81058604413776583022013-04-04T10:15:00.743+02:002013-04-04T10:15:00.743+02:00You've really got into those characters and th...You've really got into those characters and the lead up to the crime. Well done.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-68023125469414653512013-03-25T12:54:39.233+01:002013-03-25T12:54:39.233+01:00Monday March 25th, 2013
Hi Donna,
Thanks for your...Monday March 25th, 2013<br /><br />Hi Donna,<br />Thanks for your kind words. I wanted to post something and had already written 4000 words of two other stories that I decided not to use this time. I have always thought of expanding the story about Ramona & Co.<br /><br />---<br /><br />Hi Charmaine,<br />Yep! You are so right. Emil and Caroline are in trouble! I had a motive for these two, following your advice about creating a clear motive for the crime. Romana is an annoying person for many people. But I haven't worked out all the details. The word and time limit made me stop.<br /><br />---<br /><br />Dear Yolanda,<br />Yes indeed. Caroline should never have answered the telephone when Emil called. Her love for him will bring her down. She could be charged with being an accessory. She should have taken Emil to a good lawyer before going to the cops. She could also have simply identified Ramona's body without mentioning any knowledge Emil's part in this crime. She is completely innocent.<br /><br />Yes, Emil could turn on Caroline to save his own skin, but I think he really loves Caroline.<br /><br />Thanks for your encouragement. Maybe I'll rework this, maybe not. We'll see.<br /><br />---<br />Dear Denise,<br />Thanks for stopping by.<br /><br />Yes this story may seem a little flat, which is why I wrote 'NCCO' beside the word count. I wrote two other stories that hade a lot more 'colour' and discription and play with contrasting themes etc. I just did not have the time to do more with this. It's a great prompt, so I am sure you can offer it again at some later date.<br /><br />Your observations about the weaknesses in this text are noted. There are other flaws too. Caroline should act more surprised and even hurt when Emil calls her. She hasn't seen or heard from him in months. She should even be a little angry with him. She could refuse to see him let alone help him.<br /><br />And yes, Emil shouldn't be so willing to follow her to the police station.<br /><br />I know I could do more with the woman with the doggie, but that take's time and words that I didn't have here. If I were to just write freely, I could do several fun things with this dog-lady.<br />----<br />Dear Nilanjana,<br />Thanks for stopping by! I appreciate your encouragement.<br />---<br />Dear Sally,<br />Thank you also for your encouraging words. Yes, I think I painted poor Emil and Caroline into a corner. I may just rewrite the plot and have Emil continue to hid out in the cellar while Caroline goes to the police, identifies the body and pretends to be ignorant of what actually happened.<br /><br />Thank you all for taking the time to comment!<br /><br />Best wishes,<br />AnnaAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17926688000745346961noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-46937488008389007722013-03-25T09:59:35.532+01:002013-03-25T09:59:35.532+01:00They are in a rather precarious situation now, thi...They are in a rather precarious situation now, thinking they've done the right thing by going to the police and then realising they can't prove their point. Sallyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14090018804016223955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-28798428500667771062013-03-25T07:15:09.608+01:002013-03-25T07:15:09.608+01:00I remembered the opening and it was cool to read o...I remembered the opening and it was cool to read on beyond the earlier flash. The idea of taking a previous RFW flash and reworking to fit a new prompt is neat, liked that much.Nilanjana Bosehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08656370320322301943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-682898992909105142013-03-25T05:21:49.930+01:002013-03-25T05:21:49.930+01:00Hi Anna
I'm sorry I'm late in visiting. I...Hi Anna<br /><br />I'm sorry I'm late in visiting. I've been by a few times and you didn't have your story up and I wasn't able to get back onto the computer until now.<br /><br />I think you have the bones of a good story here, but it sounded a little flat. You could have made more of the doggie and lady finding the body I think...and in real life, I wonder if Emil would have docilely followed Caroline to the police station? Just wondering. <br />However, you've left this wide open. It can go anywhere now. <br /><br />Perhaps you can continue the story for another prompt as I think we'd like to see the outcome. <br /><br />What do you think?<br /><br />Thank you for coming up with a murder story for our March challenge. <br /><br />DeniseDenise Covey https://www.blogger.com/profile/07106490051555233439noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-56870092887203010262013-03-24T02:43:47.461+01:002013-03-24T02:43:47.461+01:00Good going, Anna!
Poor Caroline, she never should...Good going, Anna!<br /><br />Poor Caroline, she never should've answered Emils phone call. She's in it up to her eyebrows!<br /><br />You've got a novella, if not a novel here, especially if Emil turns on Caroline to save his own skin.<br /><br />Wonderful,I love that you continued a former story from the RFW challenges!<br />Yolanda Renéehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09085436784133103221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-3498699616225970432013-03-24T02:02:06.918+01:002013-03-24T02:02:06.918+01:00I think Emily and Caroline are in trouble now!I think Emily and Caroline are in trouble now!Charmaine Clancyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18059559142070140041noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1712353207460785993.post-68052829134754147222013-03-24T01:55:44.451+01:002013-03-24T01:55:44.451+01:00I thought I recognized the opening :) This was a g...I thought I recognized the opening :) This was a great murder mystery Anna. It had a nice, crime story flow to it. I love crime stories. These two certainly do need legal council.<br /><br />Well done.<br /><br />Thanks for participating with RFW this month.<br /><br />.......dholedolorahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08715849844092553699noreply@blogger.com